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I'm on the brink of what could be an episode of depression so I'm trying to fight my way back. Yesterday, I was sad for most of the day and topped it off with a little tiff with my hubby last night. I have a hard time calling it a fight or tiff for that matter because Mike doesn't "fight" in the manner I have been used to with other men in my life. There is no yelling (unless it's from me) and the matter always ends up in a sort of negotiation stage. I'm thankful he is healthy like this.

As for me, I have been pondering my feelings this morning. Trying to figure out where this sadness is coming from. It may be the effects of being home alone for so many weeks now. On the one hand I am getting a lot done, but on the other, I feel guilty having the kids in daycare. Next week will be the beginning of my stay-at-home life and things will get better in this regard. When you say stay-at-home mom, most people think it would be an easy gig. It's not. I think I'm a little scared about it. I guess it's like starting any other job. At first you're nervous and need to learn all the ropes. Eventually, though, you get the hang of it and maybe even enjoy it. I'm counting on this to happen and will allow myself time to adapt. I have high expectations of myself and may get frusterated some (okay, most) days but my inner dialogue must remain positive or I will end up down.

Happy thoughts to come.